Lately I've been dealing with so many stressful things in my life. I'm so frustrated and I'm totally affected with this. My head started to ache because of too much thinking. Recently I always have a dreadful dreams, before I find peace in my sleep but lately, even in my sleep those things keeps on haunting me.
Dear Mama and Papa,
All my life I'm trying my best to please you, I'm working hard to be the best but for you I'm miles and miles away from your expectations. I feel like I'm living robot that needs a master so I can be functional. I should be like this and that and go here and there. You say that I have my free will to decide but after I have made my own decisions you started to yell at me because the decisions that I come up is not the same or mutual to you. You push me to do the things that I don't want to do in the first place. Because I rejected your proposal you're starting to say things or cuss at me.
I appreciated all the things that you're doing and I'm thankful that you're guiding me but how can I become independent when you're always there to decide on my behalf. How can I stand in my own feet when you're always there guiding and standing at my side, that in every steps that I make I have to consult you first. For once, I want to drive my own life I don't want to be independent on you. I'm old enough to know what is wrong and what is right. Can you at least give me a chance to decide for myself? Can you at least respect my decisions? All my life, I followed all the things that you want for me, because you're my parents. Parents know what’s best for their children. You know how much I love you and I respect you. The only thing that ticks me off is that you're so STRICT that I can't breathe, I'm suffocated. Sigh.
I just need to express this, because I can't breathe anymore.
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